Thursday, February 27, 2003
Hair Raising Experience
Her hair, long and rusty from the years of study
Sits lightly on her thin strong shoulders.
Her voice, soft, confident and certain
Gives me the assurance I can trust in.
The room is quiet, safe and seclude.
No one knows who is inside,
We don't know who is out there.
She reaches for my glasses
As she draws out her plan of action.
She gently puts it on me
As I read the letters out slowly
One by one, correcting, squinting,
Guessing which might be the answer.
She says that's fine, that's all right
And sends a slow rush of blush
Down my back like a spinal flush,
Raising the stubbles at the back of my head
Leaving it heavy and light at the same time.
I put my trust in her, my only vision on her hands,
Waiting for her to come back
For another slow motion replay.
I smiled as she arrived.
We joked a little about the stubborn flies
As she hands me my glasses
So I could see her laughing once again.
I feel safe with her vulnerable skinny hands,
As she paints the colour of my eye
With the zen-like peace of her heaven.
I could fall into a deep sleep just then,
As she lulls me with her quiet composure.
And smile my way to dreamland
To never have to wake again.
chucKie
Her hair, long and rusty from the years of study
Sits lightly on her thin strong shoulders.
Her voice, soft, confident and certain
Gives me the assurance I can trust in.
The room is quiet, safe and seclude.
No one knows who is inside,
We don't know who is out there.
She reaches for my glasses
As she draws out her plan of action.
She gently puts it on me
As I read the letters out slowly
One by one, correcting, squinting,
Guessing which might be the answer.
She says that's fine, that's all right
And sends a slow rush of blush
Down my back like a spinal flush,
Raising the stubbles at the back of my head
Leaving it heavy and light at the same time.
I put my trust in her, my only vision on her hands,
Waiting for her to come back
For another slow motion replay.
I smiled as she arrived.
We joked a little about the stubborn flies
As she hands me my glasses
So I could see her laughing once again.
I feel safe with her vulnerable skinny hands,
As she paints the colour of my eye
With the zen-like peace of her heaven.
I could fall into a deep sleep just then,
As she lulls me with her quiet composure.
And smile my way to dreamland
To never have to wake again.
chucKie
Best Show
I believe I had the best gig last night. O-week party at a college in Clayton. Made up of mainly 19 and 20s young aussies. It was a bash!
Dancing started at 9pm and lasted for a good 4 hours! I think this is like the longest dance set I've played so far. It was mainly the newy stuff. Stuff from artists like Destiny's Child, Missy Elliot, Eminem to Kylie, Christina Aguilera to some Groove Armada, Basement Jaxx with a mix of classic hits like Mickey, Footloose, Walking on Sunshine, Billy Jean, Venus. Couldn't do any Beatles or Abba. Too young. But they went beserk with Stayin Alive (Bee Gees) and Girls Just Wanna Have Fun (Cindy Lauper)!! They were doing sync-ed line dancing to that Bee Gees track.
Most of the nights, the girls were just screaming in elation. They were pissed drunk and having so much fun ... too much. Cos during the last song, Nude School by Painters and Dockers (they requested this), everyone was eager to strip. The boys dancing on the stage actually stripped nude and danced and dangled and ... you get the picture. It was a little more than hilarious. A little more than out of control.
And this was a catholic college. The kids were dressed in devilish horns, red tights, leather boots and painted faces. Think Darthmaul from Episode One. Then there were others in cliche wings, halo, white robes and fairy like glitter all over their good over evil dress-ups.
Everyone was just in the mood for stripping, cheering, drinking, dancing, partying. It was a great night by a DJ function standard.
When I got back to return the equipment in the office, I noticed a chart on one of the walls showing some form of feedback score. The office regularly receives feedback sheets from our gigs and our GM has started a little incentive reward program* to tabulate these in terms of percentage scores based on the feeback. My GM is on the top of the list at 80 or 90%. But since she is the boss, she doesn't get the prize. So the person just below her will be the first.
And I was right under her nose at 78%. I smell self-induced competitive pressure ...
chucKie
*The top three of the rank by the end of August will get some CD vouchers. And at the end of the year, the DJ on the top will get a two day one night stay at some hotel with complimentary dinner and CD vouchers. Cool.
I believe I had the best gig last night. O-week party at a college in Clayton. Made up of mainly 19 and 20s young aussies. It was a bash!
Dancing started at 9pm and lasted for a good 4 hours! I think this is like the longest dance set I've played so far. It was mainly the newy stuff. Stuff from artists like Destiny's Child, Missy Elliot, Eminem to Kylie, Christina Aguilera to some Groove Armada, Basement Jaxx with a mix of classic hits like Mickey, Footloose, Walking on Sunshine, Billy Jean, Venus. Couldn't do any Beatles or Abba. Too young. But they went beserk with Stayin Alive (Bee Gees) and Girls Just Wanna Have Fun (Cindy Lauper)!! They were doing sync-ed line dancing to that Bee Gees track.
Most of the nights, the girls were just screaming in elation. They were pissed drunk and having so much fun ... too much. Cos during the last song, Nude School by Painters and Dockers (they requested this), everyone was eager to strip. The boys dancing on the stage actually stripped nude and danced and dangled and ... you get the picture. It was a little more than hilarious. A little more than out of control.
And this was a catholic college. The kids were dressed in devilish horns, red tights, leather boots and painted faces. Think Darthmaul from Episode One. Then there were others in cliche wings, halo, white robes and fairy like glitter all over their good over evil dress-ups.
Everyone was just in the mood for stripping, cheering, drinking, dancing, partying. It was a great night by a DJ function standard.
When I got back to return the equipment in the office, I noticed a chart on one of the walls showing some form of feedback score. The office regularly receives feedback sheets from our gigs and our GM has started a little incentive reward program* to tabulate these in terms of percentage scores based on the feeback. My GM is on the top of the list at 80 or 90%. But since she is the boss, she doesn't get the prize. So the person just below her will be the first.
And I was right under her nose at 78%. I smell self-induced competitive pressure ...
chucKie
*The top three of the rank by the end of August will get some CD vouchers. And at the end of the year, the DJ on the top will get a two day one night stay at some hotel with complimentary dinner and CD vouchers. Cool.
Wednesday, February 26, 2003
Counting Crows, Live @ Palais Theatre
Just got back from the gig. Still on a high. 2 hour set. Here's the set list.
-Have You Seen Me Lately?
-Richard Manuel is Dead
-Mr Jones
-Goodnight Elizabeth
-American Girls
-Rain King/Thunder Road alt
-A Long December/Wild Mountain Thyme alt.
-Anna Begins
-Big Yellow Taxi
-New Frontier
-Catapult
-Four White Stallions
-Miami
-Round Here/Sweet Thing (Van Morrison) alt.
Encores:
-Sullivan Street
-Hanginaround
-Blues Run The Game
-Holiday in Spain
It's a pity that they didn't do Amy Hit The Atmosphere and I Wish I Was A Girl. They would have been such sweet reminders of their hometown gig in 1999. But this is the Hard Candy Tour, so space has to be given for new songs.
I must say that they have aged alot. Not in terms of being old and not as spiffy. In fact, they are so aged that they are like old wine. Good old wine that is so strong and mature in flavour. That's what I'd reckon the gig was like. There was definitely many calculated arrangments for each song but they were done so subtly and so skillfully that it doesn't stick out at you like a sore thumb. It was enough to send a "wow" factor to the heart chamber and a high to the brain.
Only thing was the security of the venue was just too anal. A small group of us charged to the front when Adam and the guys started playing Mr Jones. It sent the crowd berserk! You just had to get out of your seat and jump, dance, jiggle, whatever. Then in the middle of the next song, Goodnight Elizabeth, the security started screaming at everyone ordering all of us to return to our seats. What a spoil sport! And to go back to our seats was such a bad idea. The theatre was exceptionally stuffy and hot cos it was just filled to the house. Standing at the corner nearer the stage made it much easier to breathe and enjoy the gig.
Bloody security.
Prior to the gig, we were walking to the theatre from Acland St and I thought I saw one of the guitarist. Sure enough, it was. David Immergluck and Dan were standing around outside Luna Park meeting up with people. We gathered our tickets and got them to autograph on them. Had a good short chat with Dan - whom in my opinion was a little spaced out. Can't blame him cos he was probably jet lagged. They just flew in from LA apparently and just got to Melbourne 3 hours ago. Still he kept his good sense of humour which was quite a treat for us. He particularly commented on Sarah's hair and said he liked it. Incidentally, he wore a red t-shirt during the gig - "for sarah" - so he says after the gig.
Yes, we met up with Dan and the WHOLE band after the gig. Unbelievable. I thought shaking Adams hand from the pit at the Warfield Theatre gig in 1999 was as good as it got. Today, we met the whole band and had a bit to chat with some of them. They weren't sitting at tables signing our stuff. They came out the back to greet and meet the fans who stayed behind!
The bassist, Matt, was the nicest, next to Adam. He's a small little guy with a humble attitude. He was like your good old neighbour who'd come over to your place to fix your plumbing if you needed. Got to stand near Adam for a good 15 minutes. Cos he was surrounded by a hoard of fans for autographs and photos. So I had to wait my turn. The poor guy just kept rotating clockwise to autograph on posters, ticket stubs, t-shirts, CD sleeves and even bus tickets! It was quite entertaining to listen to his witty remarks whenever someone asked him a question or made some groupie smuck remark. By the time it got to my turn, I wanted to take a picture with him, but he had already refused further pictures. Cos the last guy before me had given him his fair share of camera flashes. Don't think it's nice to blind him further. So I guess I'd have to miss this chance of a photo with my favourite lyricist and poet. Not upset or anything. It's just a photo. I'm sure I'd get to meet him again. And hopefully this time, we'll have more to say to each other - other than the usual fan and celebrity "it's a great show" or "I love your music" yadda yadda. Not that I said any of those.
I could have asked him who Elizabeth was. Cos that name appears in more than one of his songs. Wendy Tan was the one who pointed it out. Interesting nugget huh?
This time round, I got the whole band's autograph on the poster, chatted with Dan a little and got a good eye contact type of handshake with Adam. This essentially deconstructed the larger than life celebrity I've always experienced of the crows. Maybe I shouldn't go into that cultural studies crap. I'll stop here for now.
Yes, I've also got the full concert bootleg. Are you my best friend now?
chucKie
Just got back from the gig. Still on a high. 2 hour set. Here's the set list.
-Have You Seen Me Lately?
-Richard Manuel is Dead
-Mr Jones
-Goodnight Elizabeth
-American Girls
-Rain King/Thunder Road alt
-A Long December/Wild Mountain Thyme alt.
-Anna Begins
-Big Yellow Taxi
-New Frontier
-Catapult
-Four White Stallions
-Miami
-Round Here/Sweet Thing (Van Morrison) alt.
Encores:
-Sullivan Street
-Hanginaround
-Blues Run The Game
-Holiday in Spain
It's a pity that they didn't do Amy Hit The Atmosphere and I Wish I Was A Girl. They would have been such sweet reminders of their hometown gig in 1999. But this is the Hard Candy Tour, so space has to be given for new songs.
I must say that they have aged alot. Not in terms of being old and not as spiffy. In fact, they are so aged that they are like old wine. Good old wine that is so strong and mature in flavour. That's what I'd reckon the gig was like. There was definitely many calculated arrangments for each song but they were done so subtly and so skillfully that it doesn't stick out at you like a sore thumb. It was enough to send a "wow" factor to the heart chamber and a high to the brain.
Only thing was the security of the venue was just too anal. A small group of us charged to the front when Adam and the guys started playing Mr Jones. It sent the crowd berserk! You just had to get out of your seat and jump, dance, jiggle, whatever. Then in the middle of the next song, Goodnight Elizabeth, the security started screaming at everyone ordering all of us to return to our seats. What a spoil sport! And to go back to our seats was such a bad idea. The theatre was exceptionally stuffy and hot cos it was just filled to the house. Standing at the corner nearer the stage made it much easier to breathe and enjoy the gig.
Bloody security.
Prior to the gig, we were walking to the theatre from Acland St and I thought I saw one of the guitarist. Sure enough, it was. David Immergluck and Dan were standing around outside Luna Park meeting up with people. We gathered our tickets and got them to autograph on them. Had a good short chat with Dan - whom in my opinion was a little spaced out. Can't blame him cos he was probably jet lagged. They just flew in from LA apparently and just got to Melbourne 3 hours ago. Still he kept his good sense of humour which was quite a treat for us. He particularly commented on Sarah's hair and said he liked it. Incidentally, he wore a red t-shirt during the gig - "for sarah" - so he says after the gig.
Yes, we met up with Dan and the WHOLE band after the gig. Unbelievable. I thought shaking Adams hand from the pit at the Warfield Theatre gig in 1999 was as good as it got. Today, we met the whole band and had a bit to chat with some of them. They weren't sitting at tables signing our stuff. They came out the back to greet and meet the fans who stayed behind!
The bassist, Matt, was the nicest, next to Adam. He's a small little guy with a humble attitude. He was like your good old neighbour who'd come over to your place to fix your plumbing if you needed. Got to stand near Adam for a good 15 minutes. Cos he was surrounded by a hoard of fans for autographs and photos. So I had to wait my turn. The poor guy just kept rotating clockwise to autograph on posters, ticket stubs, t-shirts, CD sleeves and even bus tickets! It was quite entertaining to listen to his witty remarks whenever someone asked him a question or made some groupie smuck remark. By the time it got to my turn, I wanted to take a picture with him, but he had already refused further pictures. Cos the last guy before me had given him his fair share of camera flashes. Don't think it's nice to blind him further. So I guess I'd have to miss this chance of a photo with my favourite lyricist and poet. Not upset or anything. It's just a photo. I'm sure I'd get to meet him again. And hopefully this time, we'll have more to say to each other - other than the usual fan and celebrity "it's a great show" or "I love your music" yadda yadda. Not that I said any of those.
I could have asked him who Elizabeth was. Cos that name appears in more than one of his songs. Wendy Tan was the one who pointed it out. Interesting nugget huh?
This time round, I got the whole band's autograph on the poster, chatted with Dan a little and got a good eye contact type of handshake with Adam. This essentially deconstructed the larger than life celebrity I've always experienced of the crows. Maybe I shouldn't go into that cultural studies crap. I'll stop here for now.
Yes, I've also got the full concert bootleg. Are you my best friend now?
chucKie
Tuesday, February 25, 2003
Counting Down
Counting Crows concert in approximately 3 hours. Can't wait. Review will be up in less than 12 hours from now.
Woohoo!
chucKie
Counting Crows concert in approximately 3 hours. Can't wait. Review will be up in less than 12 hours from now.
Woohoo!
chucKie
45th Annual Grammy Awards
I think there is a huge mistake these guru geeze made. How can you give 8 grammys to Norah Jones and only 1 to John Mayer?
Ok, perhaps I am biased. But let me just let off some frustration here. John Mayer definietly deserves more than just 1 little token. If Norah Jones can get 8, I am sure John Mayer deserves more. Cos in my opinion, John Mayer is much much better. I think Norah Jones is quite overrated here. Yes, she is good. She is cool. Not pretty but beautiful. Has a nice drawl to that jazz voice. I don't hate jazz. I like her singles. But having heard snippets of other tracks on that album, I am not too sure if I would buy the album. Did they award her cos they liked her as the little girl of some famous guy? Maybe I shouldn't play that card here.
For what John Mayer has done, he ought to be given more recognition than that. First time listeners will be hooked on his songs and it will grow so much on you. As a performer, he's also such a great entertainment. Argh. I'm going nuts. Why only one? ONE! This is outrageous!
Maybe I should really go buy that Norah Jones' album and have a good long listen to figure out why all the candy has gone into her pockets.
Go take a look at the List of Grammy Winners and let me know what you think.
chucKie
I think there is a huge mistake these guru geeze made. How can you give 8 grammys to Norah Jones and only 1 to John Mayer?
Ok, perhaps I am biased. But let me just let off some frustration here. John Mayer definietly deserves more than just 1 little token. If Norah Jones can get 8, I am sure John Mayer deserves more. Cos in my opinion, John Mayer is much much better. I think Norah Jones is quite overrated here. Yes, she is good. She is cool. Not pretty but beautiful. Has a nice drawl to that jazz voice. I don't hate jazz. I like her singles. But having heard snippets of other tracks on that album, I am not too sure if I would buy the album. Did they award her cos they liked her as the little girl of some famous guy? Maybe I shouldn't play that card here.
For what John Mayer has done, he ought to be given more recognition than that. First time listeners will be hooked on his songs and it will grow so much on you. As a performer, he's also such a great entertainment. Argh. I'm going nuts. Why only one? ONE! This is outrageous!
Maybe I should really go buy that Norah Jones' album and have a good long listen to figure out why all the candy has gone into her pockets.
Go take a look at the List of Grammy Winners and let me know what you think.
chucKie
Whistling Insects in the night
The cool change is such a relief. The short ride to Southbank tonight got extended by two further breakdowns again. Bloody 35 degrees. What a scorcher. It's a nice 20 right now and man, do I feel like pulling the futon out to the backyard and sleep under the stars. I seriously wanna do that. But the bugs and creppy crawlies out in the wild is not such a good idea.
Had a long chat with Saz over the phone - almost 2 hours. About so many things. About so many changes and the fear we're going to face. Sigh. But this is how beautiful it's meant to be. To bring that balance to this world .... ah, bugger that. Just to live right, that's all.
Must say that we've grown to become great buddies - the next person we turn to when we are in boiling soup or feel like giving up and cry. Remember how she was always a good listener and comfort. Thanks Saz. You have a great gift. You put John Edwards to shame. Ha ha.
Anyway, enough of this nonsense. I'm feeling abit lighter after that human connection. But the face and body is still radiating heat from the hot weather. Going to open the windows and sleep. Goodnight.
chucKie
The cool change is such a relief. The short ride to Southbank tonight got extended by two further breakdowns again. Bloody 35 degrees. What a scorcher. It's a nice 20 right now and man, do I feel like pulling the futon out to the backyard and sleep under the stars. I seriously wanna do that. But the bugs and creppy crawlies out in the wild is not such a good idea.
Had a long chat with Saz over the phone - almost 2 hours. About so many things. About so many changes and the fear we're going to face. Sigh. But this is how beautiful it's meant to be. To bring that balance to this world .... ah, bugger that. Just to live right, that's all.
Must say that we've grown to become great buddies - the next person we turn to when we are in boiling soup or feel like giving up and cry. Remember how she was always a good listener and comfort. Thanks Saz. You have a great gift. You put John Edwards to shame. Ha ha.
Anyway, enough of this nonsense. I'm feeling abit lighter after that human connection. But the face and body is still radiating heat from the hot weather. Going to open the windows and sleep. Goodnight.
chucKie
Monday, February 24, 2003
Humming in the background
Woke up this morning to a phone call. Foxtel installation guy out at the front. 8am. That's early.
3 hours later, I have colour! Satellite dish above me head, remote in hand, 32 channels.
Thing is, I don't have the free to air on the set top box. Means another round of manual configuration for me. Arh!
So now Channel V is just humming in the background. Weezer's Island in the Sun.
Woke up this morning and started feeling that a lot of things are overrated. Like money. It's important. It makes things move. It changes people and it sure makes you do things you don't necessarily sometimes wanna choose.
If I wasn't in any debt, I wouldn't have bothered. Just get myself a job that earns me enough to pay bills and support my craft. But this world's been changing since I was born. Job security is now an ancient myth that's as good as the evolution theory. Owning assets is what counts and that's what scares me. The idea of having to do that just kinda scares me sometimes. No parents to teach me how to build a pipeline of clean running water. No parents with a lump sum of pension pay out, so I have to figure out the way the river runs myself. Just the same old theory of a good education, job and wife. I guess I will stop at the first part and figure out the others on my own.
Then there's also the dream of world domination. Yes, I say it without any shame. Dominate not so much to control and own. But to have an effect on. To have a voice that you and the guy next to you would reckon. To have you listen. To have them turn their heads the other way and consider that there's another world not just on the flipside.
And who could do it other than with looks, talent and commercial capitalism? Which isn't a bad thing. It's the end that matters. I think they work hand in hand. One without the other would sink the boat.
Or are we just overrated? Cos what I need is just 6 pieces of protein and 6 servings of fruit and vegetables a day to keep me going. What do you say?
chucKie
Woke up this morning to a phone call. Foxtel installation guy out at the front. 8am. That's early.
3 hours later, I have colour! Satellite dish above me head, remote in hand, 32 channels.
Thing is, I don't have the free to air on the set top box. Means another round of manual configuration for me. Arh!
So now Channel V is just humming in the background. Weezer's Island in the Sun.
Woke up this morning and started feeling that a lot of things are overrated. Like money. It's important. It makes things move. It changes people and it sure makes you do things you don't necessarily sometimes wanna choose.
If I wasn't in any debt, I wouldn't have bothered. Just get myself a job that earns me enough to pay bills and support my craft. But this world's been changing since I was born. Job security is now an ancient myth that's as good as the evolution theory. Owning assets is what counts and that's what scares me. The idea of having to do that just kinda scares me sometimes. No parents to teach me how to build a pipeline of clean running water. No parents with a lump sum of pension pay out, so I have to figure out the way the river runs myself. Just the same old theory of a good education, job and wife. I guess I will stop at the first part and figure out the others on my own.
Then there's also the dream of world domination. Yes, I say it without any shame. Dominate not so much to control and own. But to have an effect on. To have a voice that you and the guy next to you would reckon. To have you listen. To have them turn their heads the other way and consider that there's another world not just on the flipside.
And who could do it other than with looks, talent and commercial capitalism? Which isn't a bad thing. It's the end that matters. I think they work hand in hand. One without the other would sink the boat.
Or are we just overrated? Cos what I need is just 6 pieces of protein and 6 servings of fruit and vegetables a day to keep me going. What do you say?
chucKie
Sunday, February 23, 2003
Breakdown
Things just seem to want to go against the natural state of the day. Weather's been so bad that the automobile broke down and I had to stay in the hot oven for 1 hour before it would start moving. Even the road side service guy couldn't do anything. Hot weather means things break down.
Wanted to go back to the evening service to catch up with some old friends but the breakdown got me quite late into the day. Should have headed straight home instead of a detour to buy that silly clothes dryer rack and el cheapo mirror.
So many things to do. Time just seems to have a life of it's own. One more week to the beginning of the semester. Must get settled soon.
This week's theme seems to be like this: Down and Broke, Alone and Isolated, Lonely and Empty. Why does it have to culminate to this? Damn. I need a wife. Or do I, stupid?
I don't mean to complain. I'm just sick of this intermittent disruption and errand frustration. I just want this ordeal to end.
Really.
chucKie
Things just seem to want to go against the natural state of the day. Weather's been so bad that the automobile broke down and I had to stay in the hot oven for 1 hour before it would start moving. Even the road side service guy couldn't do anything. Hot weather means things break down.
Wanted to go back to the evening service to catch up with some old friends but the breakdown got me quite late into the day. Should have headed straight home instead of a detour to buy that silly clothes dryer rack and el cheapo mirror.
So many things to do. Time just seems to have a life of it's own. One more week to the beginning of the semester. Must get settled soon.
This week's theme seems to be like this: Down and Broke, Alone and Isolated, Lonely and Empty. Why does it have to culminate to this? Damn. I need a wife. Or do I, stupid?
I don't mean to complain. I'm just sick of this intermittent disruption and errand frustration. I just want this ordeal to end.
Really.
chucKie
Saturday, February 22, 2003
Sound of Breaking
This week has been so eventful, I don't even want to think about it. And it hasn't even ended. Not even close. Sigh. Think moving out into the deeper suburbs is a pretty big shift. Like it even changes the way you travel and plan your day. Things to do in the city has to be done pretty efficiently. No more lazing around and forgetting to run some errands. Sigh.
But I had a good day today. A big change from yesterday. Decided to call Shawn cos I knew he wasn't going for the wedding that the rest of the three hundred people from Melbourne city are going for. Yes, all three hundred of them, Sarah, E-Gene and Evelyn were at the wedding the whole day - for the videos and the dinner and all that. So Shawn and I met up for lunch at Brunswick St for jap food - Kazen. It was good value. Had the lunch box which gave us a good selection of sashimi, sushi, tofu, tempura, rice and miso. Had coffee few doors down at this joint which had good reviews in The Age. Can't remember the name, but the coffee was good. Then we kinda got to the rounds in the city getting the stuff I needed. Found out that the cost of replacing the lens I lost was about the same price as back home. I'm thankful.
Good news. Shawn's Blog is up again. Yay! More neighbours getting their act on this side of the line.
Promised I'd tell what my favourite berry was after you tell me yours. But only Sue was interested in the berry story. So here you go. I like blue. By elimination process, I didn't like the sour after taste of the black and the light leathery texture of the rasp. Blue has the most neutral effect. Pleasant to be exact. Like little grapes without the size and seed. Plus, blue has the most anti-oxidant of the three and is power packed with potassium for some essential health function for weight trainers - which I forgot what exactly it was. Just know that it's a recommended fruit for people who train in the gym.
Still trying to get used to the new place. In a mess as usual from a post house move. Hope I'll settle before the semester starts. You guys have a great Sunday ahead.
chucKie
This week has been so eventful, I don't even want to think about it. And it hasn't even ended. Not even close. Sigh. Think moving out into the deeper suburbs is a pretty big shift. Like it even changes the way you travel and plan your day. Things to do in the city has to be done pretty efficiently. No more lazing around and forgetting to run some errands. Sigh.
But I had a good day today. A big change from yesterday. Decided to call Shawn cos I knew he wasn't going for the wedding that the rest of the three hundred people from Melbourne city are going for. Yes, all three hundred of them, Sarah, E-Gene and Evelyn were at the wedding the whole day - for the videos and the dinner and all that. So Shawn and I met up for lunch at Brunswick St for jap food - Kazen. It was good value. Had the lunch box which gave us a good selection of sashimi, sushi, tofu, tempura, rice and miso. Had coffee few doors down at this joint which had good reviews in The Age. Can't remember the name, but the coffee was good. Then we kinda got to the rounds in the city getting the stuff I needed. Found out that the cost of replacing the lens I lost was about the same price as back home. I'm thankful.
Good news. Shawn's Blog is up again. Yay! More neighbours getting their act on this side of the line.
Promised I'd tell what my favourite berry was after you tell me yours. But only Sue was interested in the berry story. So here you go. I like blue. By elimination process, I didn't like the sour after taste of the black and the light leathery texture of the rasp. Blue has the most neutral effect. Pleasant to be exact. Like little grapes without the size and seed. Plus, blue has the most anti-oxidant of the three and is power packed with potassium for some essential health function for weight trainers - which I forgot what exactly it was. Just know that it's a recommended fruit for people who train in the gym.
Still trying to get used to the new place. In a mess as usual from a post house move. Hope I'll settle before the semester starts. You guys have a great Sunday ahead.
chucKie
Hole in the Heart
What an eventful day. Some might say its a cursed day. Some might say I'm jinxed. But I consider it Black Friday. 21 Feb 2003.
You would have noticed that I have been using my glasses for a week now. That's because I lost my left contact lens in the old apartment sink. One week later, my sis managed to send me the replacement together with the written prescription from my optometrist in Sg, so that if I ever need replacement again, I can do it here instead of having to get it done and sent here. Might as well have been a prophetic move. Cos yesterday, I received the lens in a case in the mail. And tried to put it on for the first time and it slipped out of my eye and that was the last I saw of it. I did a mine scan over the sink counter, floor and bathtub for one and a half hours but couldn't find it.
My heart sank to my soles when I realised that I wasn't going to find it. I had lost it for good. Again. That's $150 down the drain literally. Thinking about it just leaves a sour note in the left chamber of my heart. For the whole afternoon, I was in a daze and felt so much under a curse. Like why it had to happen twice in such similar circumstances. I almost got myself and Ikram into an accident on the road when we were heading to Uni to sign up for the tutorials - which we found out later was a misunderstanding on my part. No tutorial sign ups was ever announced. Then how did I get that email concerning signing up for tutorials? Something's waging in the spiritual realm I think. I am so puzzled I think it's beyond logic. It's like some form of conspiracy theory to sabotage the rhythm of my life. I feel so stabbed in the back and taken for a ride except there's no one to blame but the fact that sometimes 'shit happens'. And it has been going on for some time now.
Please pray for me. I am going to pray for the blood of the lamb on my door post and His angels to surround and protect me. I am a child of God. The evil one cannot touch me. I claim Romans 8:28. God works all things for the good of those who love Him and who are called according to his purposes (my paraphrase).
I don't think I am being paranoid. Just being aware of the reality of the spiritual side of life.
chucKie
What an eventful day. Some might say its a cursed day. Some might say I'm jinxed. But I consider it Black Friday. 21 Feb 2003.
You would have noticed that I have been using my glasses for a week now. That's because I lost my left contact lens in the old apartment sink. One week later, my sis managed to send me the replacement together with the written prescription from my optometrist in Sg, so that if I ever need replacement again, I can do it here instead of having to get it done and sent here. Might as well have been a prophetic move. Cos yesterday, I received the lens in a case in the mail. And tried to put it on for the first time and it slipped out of my eye and that was the last I saw of it. I did a mine scan over the sink counter, floor and bathtub for one and a half hours but couldn't find it.
My heart sank to my soles when I realised that I wasn't going to find it. I had lost it for good. Again. That's $150 down the drain literally. Thinking about it just leaves a sour note in the left chamber of my heart. For the whole afternoon, I was in a daze and felt so much under a curse. Like why it had to happen twice in such similar circumstances. I almost got myself and Ikram into an accident on the road when we were heading to Uni to sign up for the tutorials - which we found out later was a misunderstanding on my part. No tutorial sign ups was ever announced. Then how did I get that email concerning signing up for tutorials? Something's waging in the spiritual realm I think. I am so puzzled I think it's beyond logic. It's like some form of conspiracy theory to sabotage the rhythm of my life. I feel so stabbed in the back and taken for a ride except there's no one to blame but the fact that sometimes 'shit happens'. And it has been going on for some time now.
Please pray for me. I am going to pray for the blood of the lamb on my door post and His angels to surround and protect me. I am a child of God. The evil one cannot touch me. I claim Romans 8:28. God works all things for the good of those who love Him and who are called according to his purposes (my paraphrase).
I don't think I am being paranoid. Just being aware of the reality of the spiritual side of life.
chucKie
Wednesday, February 19, 2003
NEWSFLASH: Kidnapped Blog Rescued. Scroll Down.
Return to Innocence
Thank God for the safety of this place. Was feeling pretty paranoid when Sarah told me that the news reported the police was after a serial arsonist in Reservoir. Which is pretty near where I have moved to today - 18 Feb 2003. Was watching Gangs of New York with the guys and couldn't concentrate for the first half of the movie. Kept thinking about the new place and getting paranoid. Half the time I was having these self induced visions of stolen lap tops and burnt down houses. The panic kinda set in when I realised that I haven't activated my contents insurance yet. I was going to do it today but due to the logistics of the day, I couldn't sit down and call AFS to go ahead with the quote. Will do that first thing in the morning when I get to find the number to call.
There's a review to come for the movie which i just watched tonight. But will get to that later. For starters, I enjoyed it and love it.
So, when I got home, after dropping by my old place to pick up some toiletries and towels I left behind, I made my way home, the whole time praying that something wouldn't have already happened. And nothing did. I'm seriously relieved.
Met the nice lady who lives next door to me. Actually met her cat first. Ami would go into her gargar spanish jibberish if she saw the cat. It was immaculate. White with irregular streaks of pastel brown. Nice pointy ears and an almost symmetrical face. When I got back tonight, the owner, Suzie, came out to find out who it was. We chatted a little about the place and how quiet it is and all that. I'm looking forward to forming new friendships around here and of course with those lovely cats of hers. She's got 3 cats by the way. Yummy.
And talking about that. I was pretty hungry when I got home. I should have gotten the microwave packs from the 7-11 store on my way back. But decided it wasn't healthy at all - what with all that processed trans-fatty acid. Looked into my war torn fridge and found the tri-pack of rasberries, blackberries and blueberries. And the orange juice. But there was no cups around. Left them at the old apartment. What a doosh I am. So I drank from the 2 litres bottle and ate the berries to satisfy the hunger while typing out this entry. Which, will be posted late. At least until I get to connect tomorrow via 56k modem.
So here's a random quiz. Which berry do you like? Rasp, Blue or Black? And why? I'll tell you what I like in the next entry. Use the flooble and tell me.
chucKie
Thank God for the safety of this place. Was feeling pretty paranoid when Sarah told me that the news reported the police was after a serial arsonist in Reservoir. Which is pretty near where I have moved to today - 18 Feb 2003. Was watching Gangs of New York with the guys and couldn't concentrate for the first half of the movie. Kept thinking about the new place and getting paranoid. Half the time I was having these self induced visions of stolen lap tops and burnt down houses. The panic kinda set in when I realised that I haven't activated my contents insurance yet. I was going to do it today but due to the logistics of the day, I couldn't sit down and call AFS to go ahead with the quote. Will do that first thing in the morning when I get to find the number to call.
There's a review to come for the movie which i just watched tonight. But will get to that later. For starters, I enjoyed it and love it.
So, when I got home, after dropping by my old place to pick up some toiletries and towels I left behind, I made my way home, the whole time praying that something wouldn't have already happened. And nothing did. I'm seriously relieved.
Met the nice lady who lives next door to me. Actually met her cat first. Ami would go into her gargar spanish jibberish if she saw the cat. It was immaculate. White with irregular streaks of pastel brown. Nice pointy ears and an almost symmetrical face. When I got back tonight, the owner, Suzie, came out to find out who it was. We chatted a little about the place and how quiet it is and all that. I'm looking forward to forming new friendships around here and of course with those lovely cats of hers. She's got 3 cats by the way. Yummy.
And talking about that. I was pretty hungry when I got home. I should have gotten the microwave packs from the 7-11 store on my way back. But decided it wasn't healthy at all - what with all that processed trans-fatty acid. Looked into my war torn fridge and found the tri-pack of rasberries, blackberries and blueberries. And the orange juice. But there was no cups around. Left them at the old apartment. What a doosh I am. So I drank from the 2 litres bottle and ate the berries to satisfy the hunger while typing out this entry. Which, will be posted late. At least until I get to connect tomorrow via 56k modem.
So here's a random quiz. Which berry do you like? Rasp, Blue or Black? And why? I'll tell you what I like in the next entry. Use the flooble and tell me.
chucKie
Monday, February 17, 2003
Moving
Due to some constraints of people getting married and those leaving for sydney, I have scheduled to move tomorrow - Tuesday Feb 18.
Might not be able to blog much because internet access is not really set up yet in the new place and I am cancelling this present one. Phone line's not connected there till Friday so that should leave me limited time and access on blogging and all that online life. So bear with the empty dead air for the next few days you might expect.
Hope it's a smooth move tomorrow. Later.
chucKie
Due to some constraints of people getting married and those leaving for sydney, I have scheduled to move tomorrow - Tuesday Feb 18.
Might not be able to blog much because internet access is not really set up yet in the new place and I am cancelling this present one. Phone line's not connected there till Friday so that should leave me limited time and access on blogging and all that online life. So bear with the empty dead air for the next few days you might expect.
Hope it's a smooth move tomorrow. Later.
chucKie
Alison Wedding
Just found out this morning that Alison Wedding is performing this Friday at Bennetts Lane again. And I am going to miss that performance for the second time. The first time she was performing this year was during the Melbourne International Jazz Festival. I was working the night she was performing. And this Friday, I am out working again. Not happy.
If you are in town this weekend, make sure you go catch Alison Wedding at the Bennetts Lane. You will burn all your Diana Krall CDs after that.
chucKie
Just found out this morning that Alison Wedding is performing this Friday at Bennetts Lane again. And I am going to miss that performance for the second time. The first time she was performing this year was during the Melbourne International Jazz Festival. I was working the night she was performing. And this Friday, I am out working again. Not happy.
If you are in town this weekend, make sure you go catch Alison Wedding at the Bennetts Lane. You will burn all your Diana Krall CDs after that.
chucKie
Devastation
Got out of the building into the cold and made my way to the Barkly Square supermarket. Then, as I reached the parking lot of the supermarket, it landed on me like a car crash. It hit me like ten thousand enigma plagues. Deep unexplainable sorrow. It's happening again.
Somehow watching the car pull off in front of me and disappearing into the distant night left me hanging like a scarecrow waiting for the sunrise. I guess it will never be the same again. I felt very uneasy.
Got home, sat down in the bathroom and called Wally. Missed him and Ami quite terribly and needed to just hear a familiar voice. He was on his way to somewhere with Ami in his Dad's car. Spoke a while and told him to come back quickly. Said he would and I told him I felt so much better and was going to cook myself something to eat and feel better after that. Promised not to jump off too. Put down the phone and started laughing uncontrollably at how absurd this whole thing was. All the drama I can do without. Then, tears started rolling from my eyes and I cried uncontrollably like I lost my way... again.
For that moment sitting in the corner of my bathroom, I felt like an unwanted kid whose parents have decided to divorce after 10 years of marriage. And it was up to the law to allocate where I will eventually end up.
I guess I am constantly going to feel this way for the rest of my life. I hate it. I don't want to live this. I don't need to. I don't have to. What could have didn't quite take place. The love, the affection and moral sympathy came too late into this lifespan. Some desires got twisted along the way and I haven't been able to see clearly. Have been waiting for the smoke to clear but I think this one's going to take a long while.
And while I wait, maybe I should put some music to this tragedy.
chucKie
Got out of the building into the cold and made my way to the Barkly Square supermarket. Then, as I reached the parking lot of the supermarket, it landed on me like a car crash. It hit me like ten thousand enigma plagues. Deep unexplainable sorrow. It's happening again.
Somehow watching the car pull off in front of me and disappearing into the distant night left me hanging like a scarecrow waiting for the sunrise. I guess it will never be the same again. I felt very uneasy.
Got home, sat down in the bathroom and called Wally. Missed him and Ami quite terribly and needed to just hear a familiar voice. He was on his way to somewhere with Ami in his Dad's car. Spoke a while and told him to come back quickly. Said he would and I told him I felt so much better and was going to cook myself something to eat and feel better after that. Promised not to jump off too. Put down the phone and started laughing uncontrollably at how absurd this whole thing was. All the drama I can do without. Then, tears started rolling from my eyes and I cried uncontrollably like I lost my way... again.
For that moment sitting in the corner of my bathroom, I felt like an unwanted kid whose parents have decided to divorce after 10 years of marriage. And it was up to the law to allocate where I will eventually end up.
I guess I am constantly going to feel this way for the rest of my life. I hate it. I don't want to live this. I don't need to. I don't have to. What could have didn't quite take place. The love, the affection and moral sympathy came too late into this lifespan. Some desires got twisted along the way and I haven't been able to see clearly. Have been waiting for the smoke to clear but I think this one's going to take a long while.
And while I wait, maybe I should put some music to this tragedy.
chucKie
Sunday, February 16, 2003
Rules of Engagement
This is a public announcement on behalf of Sarah Wong. She called me this morning and with what she had to say I was awake instantly even though I had only 5 hours of sleep. This is the close transcript.
Sarah: Hey Charles, finally woke you up!
Charles: uh, yah....
Sarah: So how? you going church or not?
Charles: I'm trying to. I worked last night, so slept at 3 am...
Sarah: (sounding serious) hey, I've got something to tell you...
Charles: Oh, what is it?
Sarah: Well, a lot of things happened over the equipping weekend and well, E-Gene isn't my boyfriend anymore.
Charles: WHAT? Are you serious?
Sarah: Yah, our status has changed...
Charles: Like for real? Like permanent? ... What happened?
Sarah: (with a slight giggle and sounding a little embarrassed) Well ... cos now ... He is my FIANCE!
I almost flipped! No, actually I laughed alot and flipped. Not that I found it amusing that they were now finally engaged. It wasn't too much a surprise for me cos I knew E-Gene already had such plans in that little brain of his to rescue Sarah before she gets hooked by some TCS hunk - yes, yes, those dreams must've speeded things up. Tsk tsk, Sarah is quite cunning I can see... But the truth about E-Gene is that, he's the man. He's been thinking and talking about marriage for some time since, even before we came here.
That was a good joke she pulled on me though, completely throwing me off the edge making me think that they broke up for good. A million things went through my mind when I was still on that thought ... like oh, no, got lots of listening to do, a lot of being sensitive and situations to handle, a lot of crying together and all that drama and I was bracing myself for that saga to come until it turned out completely the other way.
It's quite sad for me if you ask me. Not sad that they are to be weds. I'm happy for them. I'm looking forward to the day when she will don her white sash and him his black tux. I'm looking forward to the rows and rows of cars and the rows and rows of flowers and the rows and rows of ... children they are going to produce. Well, E-Gene loves football and kids, so there you go.
Sad cos it's almost like losing someone. I remember when two close pals of mine - pals I grew up with in my teenage years through all that down and up time - got together as a couple, I plunged into an abyss of enigma. I couldn't tell what it was. I couldn't explain why I felt like that. All I knew was an unlikely deep sense of loss and pain. It took me a while to realise that the effect of that was losing them as two friends. Cos when two of your friends become one - you now only have one friend. Yes, it sounds absurdly mathematical void of emotions but that boils down to the truth of what actually was happening. Think about it, the dynamics of the relationship would change. And at that time, it did change. It made hanging out together different. It means sometimes the couple needed an out and you needed to give it to them. And there are times when they needed an out and they included that out with you in it and you are stuck watching them display their dirty linen out in the sun.
I guess I've seen all the beautiful, cliche, romantic, ugly and dark moments in their relationship and now in Sarah and E-Gene's as well. It's almost becoming a trend. Adam Duritz had this line that got stuck in my head - "All my friends got flowers in their eyes, but I got none this season." Guess times like these, happy times of christmas turkeys and valentine cheesecakes just reminds certain people of their loneliness here on this earth. And I know how exactly Adam felt. Or at least I think that was what he felt. To a certain extent, "This Desert Life" album dealt with such themes of loneliness, getting to a certain age where everyone seems to fill up the mould of a happy family with two kids and a house. Is this a disease of a songwriter? Maybe we think too much and want too much to be perfect. But what's wrong with beauty - isn't that what weddings are made of?
Last night as I was going out to get some midnight grocery shopping done, I was listening to "Across the night" by Silverchair and there was a line that got to me. "I don't want to be lonely. Just want to be alone." Funny how ironic life can get. Cos I've been feeling this way for a long time.
But enough about this sadness thing. I wrote a poem about it when I first felt sad way back in 1996 when my two close pals got together. Thing is, it's not even about me. It's about them. Their lives and their choices and their future together. As a friend I just have to believe and trust that they made the right decision and stick by it no matter what. And that's what I'm going to do.
I'm looking forward to more of these subtraction games. It's getting fun.
chucKie
This is a public announcement on behalf of Sarah Wong. She called me this morning and with what she had to say I was awake instantly even though I had only 5 hours of sleep. This is the close transcript.
Sarah: Hey Charles, finally woke you up!
Charles: uh, yah....
Sarah: So how? you going church or not?
Charles: I'm trying to. I worked last night, so slept at 3 am...
Sarah: (sounding serious) hey, I've got something to tell you...
Charles: Oh, what is it?
Sarah: Well, a lot of things happened over the equipping weekend and well, E-Gene isn't my boyfriend anymore.
Charles: WHAT? Are you serious?
Sarah: Yah, our status has changed...
Charles: Like for real? Like permanent? ... What happened?
Sarah: (with a slight giggle and sounding a little embarrassed) Well ... cos now ... He is my FIANCE!
I almost flipped! No, actually I laughed alot and flipped. Not that I found it amusing that they were now finally engaged. It wasn't too much a surprise for me cos I knew E-Gene already had such plans in that little brain of his to rescue Sarah before she gets hooked by some TCS hunk - yes, yes, those dreams must've speeded things up. Tsk tsk, Sarah is quite cunning I can see... But the truth about E-Gene is that, he's the man. He's been thinking and talking about marriage for some time since, even before we came here.
That was a good joke she pulled on me though, completely throwing me off the edge making me think that they broke up for good. A million things went through my mind when I was still on that thought ... like oh, no, got lots of listening to do, a lot of being sensitive and situations to handle, a lot of crying together and all that drama and I was bracing myself for that saga to come until it turned out completely the other way.
It's quite sad for me if you ask me. Not sad that they are to be weds. I'm happy for them. I'm looking forward to the day when she will don her white sash and him his black tux. I'm looking forward to the rows and rows of cars and the rows and rows of flowers and the rows and rows of ... children they are going to produce. Well, E-Gene loves football and kids, so there you go.
Sad cos it's almost like losing someone. I remember when two close pals of mine - pals I grew up with in my teenage years through all that down and up time - got together as a couple, I plunged into an abyss of enigma. I couldn't tell what it was. I couldn't explain why I felt like that. All I knew was an unlikely deep sense of loss and pain. It took me a while to realise that the effect of that was losing them as two friends. Cos when two of your friends become one - you now only have one friend. Yes, it sounds absurdly mathematical void of emotions but that boils down to the truth of what actually was happening. Think about it, the dynamics of the relationship would change. And at that time, it did change. It made hanging out together different. It means sometimes the couple needed an out and you needed to give it to them. And there are times when they needed an out and they included that out with you in it and you are stuck watching them display their dirty linen out in the sun.
I guess I've seen all the beautiful, cliche, romantic, ugly and dark moments in their relationship and now in Sarah and E-Gene's as well. It's almost becoming a trend. Adam Duritz had this line that got stuck in my head - "All my friends got flowers in their eyes, but I got none this season." Guess times like these, happy times of christmas turkeys and valentine cheesecakes just reminds certain people of their loneliness here on this earth. And I know how exactly Adam felt. Or at least I think that was what he felt. To a certain extent, "This Desert Life" album dealt with such themes of loneliness, getting to a certain age where everyone seems to fill up the mould of a happy family with two kids and a house. Is this a disease of a songwriter? Maybe we think too much and want too much to be perfect. But what's wrong with beauty - isn't that what weddings are made of?
Last night as I was going out to get some midnight grocery shopping done, I was listening to "Across the night" by Silverchair and there was a line that got to me. "I don't want to be lonely. Just want to be alone." Funny how ironic life can get. Cos I've been feeling this way for a long time.
But enough about this sadness thing. I wrote a poem about it when I first felt sad way back in 1996 when my two close pals got together. Thing is, it's not even about me. It's about them. Their lives and their choices and their future together. As a friend I just have to believe and trust that they made the right decision and stick by it no matter what. And that's what I'm going to do.
I'm looking forward to more of these subtraction games. It's getting fun.
chucKie
Friday, February 14, 2003
New Place
Collected my keys in the late arvo. I have 3 sets of keys. Meaning I can have two other people bunking in with me once in a while. Hmm, a wife and a dog. Sounds good.
One down side though. The landlord has just announced sale of the apartment I am renting. I signed a 6 month's lease and if the sale goes through to someone who wants to buy it to stay in, I'll have to move out. I hope it doesn't come to that. Not that I am in utter infatuation with this place I'll be staying at, but at the price and space I get, it's quite a bargain. Plus moving again in 6 months is just such a bad idea. All the set up costs is just maddening.
Plus, every Thursday and Saturday for about half an hour in the evening, for the next 6 months, my place is supposed to be open for viewing. I'm staying in an open house! Argh! I hope nothing gets lost though. Must get contents insurance immediately. Talk about privacy! Sigh, guess this could be an incentive for me to make sure the place is in a reasonable condition most of the time.
Also, just discovered that my place ain't Reservoir. It's now Preston East. Can somebody make up their mind? It was Preston, then Resevoir and now Preston East. So is it 3073 or 3072? One digit of a difference could send my mails awry. Should I trust the melways, the post office or the agent?
Will be moving some stuff along the week, but preferably by Feb 22, I'll be outta here and living the suburbia life.
chucKie
Collected my keys in the late arvo. I have 3 sets of keys. Meaning I can have two other people bunking in with me once in a while. Hmm, a wife and a dog. Sounds good.
One down side though. The landlord has just announced sale of the apartment I am renting. I signed a 6 month's lease and if the sale goes through to someone who wants to buy it to stay in, I'll have to move out. I hope it doesn't come to that. Not that I am in utter infatuation with this place I'll be staying at, but at the price and space I get, it's quite a bargain. Plus moving again in 6 months is just such a bad idea. All the set up costs is just maddening.
Plus, every Thursday and Saturday for about half an hour in the evening, for the next 6 months, my place is supposed to be open for viewing. I'm staying in an open house! Argh! I hope nothing gets lost though. Must get contents insurance immediately. Talk about privacy! Sigh, guess this could be an incentive for me to make sure the place is in a reasonable condition most of the time.
Also, just discovered that my place ain't Reservoir. It's now Preston East. Can somebody make up their mind? It was Preston, then Resevoir and now Preston East. So is it 3073 or 3072? One digit of a difference could send my mails awry. Should I trust the melways, the post office or the agent?
Will be moving some stuff along the week, but preferably by Feb 22, I'll be outta here and living the suburbia life.
chucKie
Not a wink
Think this might become part of my lifestyle soon and it's scaring me. Was working on the webpage for my summer module. Which incidentally is due today - Valentine's Day!
Worked on it the whole night. The part that took the longest was to get the videos edited, the pop up windows. Ha ha! I know javascript! Yah right, like it's some prewritten standard script, man!
There's a few videos, pictures of old gigs and a brand new song on mp3 - a raw mix without bass lines. Let me know what you guys think. I will now go shopping for a domain and space host. Right now the site is on the school's server, which would be deleted once the new semester starts - which is in 2 weeks! But for now, enjoy and give me all the feedback you can. Thanks!
click to go : Charles Jediah Tan
chucKie
Think this might become part of my lifestyle soon and it's scaring me. Was working on the webpage for my summer module. Which incidentally is due today - Valentine's Day!
Worked on it the whole night. The part that took the longest was to get the videos edited, the pop up windows. Ha ha! I know javascript! Yah right, like it's some prewritten standard script, man!
There's a few videos, pictures of old gigs and a brand new song on mp3 - a raw mix without bass lines. Let me know what you guys think. I will now go shopping for a domain and space host. Right now the site is on the school's server, which would be deleted once the new semester starts - which is in 2 weeks! But for now, enjoy and give me all the feedback you can. Thanks!
click to go : Charles Jediah Tan
chucKie
Wednesday, February 12, 2003
Good Days
Had a look at some old 'chucKie' performance footage at EG's. Was trying to get them converted from DV to Quicktime format but the windows machine hung before it could finish the job. Shan't complain too much about Windows for now cos EG is using Win XP and his software to help me with that. One has to be a grateful goat of the moment. But Jon expressed it well. Macs rule!
Anyhow, it did bring back good memories when the times were better before all that drama started. I do remember it was my last gig as a solo artist before going into studio to record my first LP. That was the plan that didn't take place. And of course the band that performed with me slowly trickled away. Guess I shouldn't sound like they abandoned me altogether. Each had their own bells to ring so I guess it was just a matter of growing up. There was a lot of growing up for me to do at that time too. It's easy to blame someone else for how you feel right now and how you were made to feel then.
But that video captured the moment before things started to break up. It was the gig at cornerstone. I was invited to perform just before the message. Was quite an honour to be the opening band for a pastor. Think we did four songs. I thought I looked pretty good in the shots Wally took. Never did realise that the inexpensive Hamer Electric was such a show star. It looked quite amazing on stage with all that light gleaming over it. I miss those days. Had a terrible job but my weekend lifestyle kept me alive. I really do miss performing and the future still looks uncertain for me at this point.
Don't get me wrong. I'm definitely still carving my path. With my bare hands, that is. Formerly, I had to depend on the expertise of other talented musicians to lend me their support. Now, I'm trying to do everything on my own. The acoustic and electric guitars, the basses, the drum tracks, the vocals, the harmony, the arrangements, the engineering, the techies - the lot. Guess breaking up has its merits of pushing me beyond my limitations. Daunting is an understatement, but progress and results have been promising and exciting. The only part left is how well it will fit in your ears. It's a great learning environment and definitely one of discipline. One which I really do need to work on.
The webpage project is due this Friday. Which will also mean that the site will be ready to be launched. Just need to shop around for an appropriate domain and server before it gets officially launched. But the temporary parking site (the school server) will be used for beta visitors. I will hopefully have two brand new mp3s for download and some of that old footage. Two more days to work my ass off. Better sleep now and get cracking tomorrow.
And guess what? I won't be chucKie anymore.
chucKie
Had a look at some old 'chucKie' performance footage at EG's. Was trying to get them converted from DV to Quicktime format but the windows machine hung before it could finish the job. Shan't complain too much about Windows for now cos EG is using Win XP and his software to help me with that. One has to be a grateful goat of the moment. But Jon expressed it well. Macs rule!
Anyhow, it did bring back good memories when the times were better before all that drama started. I do remember it was my last gig as a solo artist before going into studio to record my first LP. That was the plan that didn't take place. And of course the band that performed with me slowly trickled away. Guess I shouldn't sound like they abandoned me altogether. Each had their own bells to ring so I guess it was just a matter of growing up. There was a lot of growing up for me to do at that time too. It's easy to blame someone else for how you feel right now and how you were made to feel then.
But that video captured the moment before things started to break up. It was the gig at cornerstone. I was invited to perform just before the message. Was quite an honour to be the opening band for a pastor. Think we did four songs. I thought I looked pretty good in the shots Wally took. Never did realise that the inexpensive Hamer Electric was such a show star. It looked quite amazing on stage with all that light gleaming over it. I miss those days. Had a terrible job but my weekend lifestyle kept me alive. I really do miss performing and the future still looks uncertain for me at this point.
Don't get me wrong. I'm definitely still carving my path. With my bare hands, that is. Formerly, I had to depend on the expertise of other talented musicians to lend me their support. Now, I'm trying to do everything on my own. The acoustic and electric guitars, the basses, the drum tracks, the vocals, the harmony, the arrangements, the engineering, the techies - the lot. Guess breaking up has its merits of pushing me beyond my limitations. Daunting is an understatement, but progress and results have been promising and exciting. The only part left is how well it will fit in your ears. It's a great learning environment and definitely one of discipline. One which I really do need to work on.
The webpage project is due this Friday. Which will also mean that the site will be ready to be launched. Just need to shop around for an appropriate domain and server before it gets officially launched. But the temporary parking site (the school server) will be used for beta visitors. I will hopefully have two brand new mp3s for download and some of that old footage. Two more days to work my ass off. Better sleep now and get cracking tomorrow.
And guess what? I won't be chucKie anymore.
chucKie
Monday, February 10, 2003
Camper
My first pair of Camper shoes. Deep red or warm maroon. Code:16732 or by description, Brothers Krypton Salsa, Afelpado Salsa.
Didn't want to go to Crown after a few of the Southbankers didn't want to go but went anyway. Was I glad I did.
Auntie Rose (E-Gene's mum) went, "Camper shoes. Inside. $149." It was enough to send me into the shop to try on a pair.
And they had my exact size. For only $149 (formerly $254.95). And deep red! Love at first sight!
So where to tomorrow to show off my new leather?
chucKie
My first pair of Camper shoes. Deep red or warm maroon. Code:16732 or by description, Brothers Krypton Salsa, Afelpado Salsa.
Didn't want to go to Crown after a few of the Southbankers didn't want to go but went anyway. Was I glad I did.
Auntie Rose (E-Gene's mum) went, "Camper shoes. Inside. $149." It was enough to send me into the shop to try on a pair.
And they had my exact size. For only $149 (formerly $254.95). And deep red! Love at first sight!
So where to tomorrow to show off my new leather?
chucKie
Sunday, February 09, 2003
Late Edition
This happened yesterday. Think I must have got out of bed on the wrong side.
Was putting on my lenses to get ready to go out and meet a business prospect. Realised that I hadn't disinfected them, so decided to give them a little rub with the cleaner before putting them on. Right lens, rubadubdub, turn tap on, rinse, shake off excess water, put on index finger, lean close to mirror, pull open right eye, pop! There, right eye done. Left lens out of case, rubadubdub... hmm, that replacement for Bill O'Reilly is quite weak huh... (TV was switched on, on Fox News Channel) not that exciting, not argumentative enough, wonder what happened to Bill, might have fallen ill... hope he'll be back tomorrow, love that guy ... turn tap on, rinse hands, wipe hands... hang on wait a minute. Something's wrong... Vision blurry. Squint. Close left eye - vision perfect. Close right eye - vision ... blur. Hmm.
Argh! Where did my left lens go! Back track ... left lens out of lens case, rubadubdub... rinse, dry hands... oh no! I washed the lens down the sink!!! ARGHHH!!!!
Attempted to dig for it but ended up slipping more rubbish into the deep sink. Even used the pump to regurgitate the residue water out, only to end up with sewage water splattering all over my face. And my face was already clean.
Plus, all the drama got me quite late for the business meeting I was going out for. 20 minutes late and my business prospect only had 10 minutes left. Like my associate put it, 'she's not happy jan!' - a.k.a. yellow pages ad.
What a day. And you knew how bad the function that night went. I'm just glad to wake up to a nice late morning of half boiled eggs, multi grain toast and ginseng drink.
but this morning, I woke up missing someone. That someone from one year ago.
chucKie
This happened yesterday. Think I must have got out of bed on the wrong side.
Was putting on my lenses to get ready to go out and meet a business prospect. Realised that I hadn't disinfected them, so decided to give them a little rub with the cleaner before putting them on. Right lens, rubadubdub, turn tap on, rinse, shake off excess water, put on index finger, lean close to mirror, pull open right eye, pop! There, right eye done. Left lens out of case, rubadubdub... hmm, that replacement for Bill O'Reilly is quite weak huh... (TV was switched on, on Fox News Channel) not that exciting, not argumentative enough, wonder what happened to Bill, might have fallen ill... hope he'll be back tomorrow, love that guy ... turn tap on, rinse hands, wipe hands... hang on wait a minute. Something's wrong... Vision blurry. Squint. Close left eye - vision perfect. Close right eye - vision ... blur. Hmm.
Argh! Where did my left lens go! Back track ... left lens out of lens case, rubadubdub... rinse, dry hands... oh no! I washed the lens down the sink!!! ARGHHH!!!!
Attempted to dig for it but ended up slipping more rubbish into the deep sink. Even used the pump to regurgitate the residue water out, only to end up with sewage water splattering all over my face. And my face was already clean.
Plus, all the drama got me quite late for the business meeting I was going out for. 20 minutes late and my business prospect only had 10 minutes left. Like my associate put it, 'she's not happy jan!' - a.k.a. yellow pages ad.
What a day. And you knew how bad the function that night went. I'm just glad to wake up to a nice late morning of half boiled eggs, multi grain toast and ginseng drink.
but this morning, I woke up missing someone. That someone from one year ago.
chucKie
Obnoxious, Pathetic Losers
I think it is really sad how we suck up to people who have that few extra thousands to shed. We become their dog, put on the collar and be their beck and call.
I think what's even sadder is the fact that the more posh you are, the worst of the lot you become.
How so? Let's look at the service industry.
I realised how sad and pathetic some of these high society banquet service providers are. The more up market you are only means one thing. You serve the rich and famous. It also means you have a high price tag. You provide the best service, the best food, the best cocktails - the best selection only the rich, the filthy bastard rich, can afford. But the word here is serve. And serves you right like a slave at their beck and call. Nothing must go wrong or these baffoons will start kicking up a fuss like kids on a tantrum routine. If you place the olives on the left instead of the right, you're in trouble. If the ice cream melts before it arrives in the mouths of these hounds, you're in hot shit. If the water doesn't get filled before they finish the wine, you're the next one up on the hangman platform.
So you scurry like roaches behind the scenes only to appear calm and professional on the outside. Nothing absolutely must go wrong - not even a crease on the table cloth, napkins and curtains. And oh, yes, of course the music must be perfect, the way you walk, stride, carry your plates have to be oh so very neat. No big movements. Control is the word. Even if it means holding your breath so you won't disturb the balance of the moisture retention or lack thereof in the room. No wonder you guys are so anal and uptight. What's wrong with you? Relax.
It's sad, really, how these gold trimming plates are just useless in my opinion. Useless cos they only look good. They are heavy and not microwave safe. How quaint is that? I guess it's a pretty subtle thing and if you get it, you get it. If you don't, well, you sad sad loser, you just don't. Just wish that you keep getting new cars from your father in law - that'll keep you at his beck and call, you lowdown son of a shameless cow.
But maybe I shouldn't be ranting about you right now, cos one day I might be your rich neighbour playing golf next to you. No, that's not right. I won't play golf - not with you around. I won't bow to that golden calf you carved out in front of the church you professed you believed in. How dare you say grace and corner me like you did.
It's making me wanna fight. It's making me wanna kick the asses of my vindicators and show them once and for all I am not the victim of their selfish bullies. It's making me angry. But it's making me stronger. It's making me richer. It's making me evolve. It's making me wanna fly and rise above the nonsense and the noise. I just wish you'd never existed.
I'm not saying this as a 'wait till I get my revenge' sort of thing. It's just a reaction to your inhuman behaviour. Why, look, the world is in chaos - children dying, bombs detonating, sky is falling - there is so much civil unrest. But there you are praying and thanking God that you are not like them, comfortable in your tie and suit, joking about the number of expensive cars you've got. Do I read hypocrisy?
Watch where you are headed towards. Don't sell out like the rest of the herd.
chucKie
I think it is really sad how we suck up to people who have that few extra thousands to shed. We become their dog, put on the collar and be their beck and call.
I think what's even sadder is the fact that the more posh you are, the worst of the lot you become.
How so? Let's look at the service industry.
I realised how sad and pathetic some of these high society banquet service providers are. The more up market you are only means one thing. You serve the rich and famous. It also means you have a high price tag. You provide the best service, the best food, the best cocktails - the best selection only the rich, the filthy bastard rich, can afford. But the word here is serve. And serves you right like a slave at their beck and call. Nothing must go wrong or these baffoons will start kicking up a fuss like kids on a tantrum routine. If you place the olives on the left instead of the right, you're in trouble. If the ice cream melts before it arrives in the mouths of these hounds, you're in hot shit. If the water doesn't get filled before they finish the wine, you're the next one up on the hangman platform.
So you scurry like roaches behind the scenes only to appear calm and professional on the outside. Nothing absolutely must go wrong - not even a crease on the table cloth, napkins and curtains. And oh, yes, of course the music must be perfect, the way you walk, stride, carry your plates have to be oh so very neat. No big movements. Control is the word. Even if it means holding your breath so you won't disturb the balance of the moisture retention or lack thereof in the room. No wonder you guys are so anal and uptight. What's wrong with you? Relax.
It's sad, really, how these gold trimming plates are just useless in my opinion. Useless cos they only look good. They are heavy and not microwave safe. How quaint is that? I guess it's a pretty subtle thing and if you get it, you get it. If you don't, well, you sad sad loser, you just don't. Just wish that you keep getting new cars from your father in law - that'll keep you at his beck and call, you lowdown son of a shameless cow.
But maybe I shouldn't be ranting about you right now, cos one day I might be your rich neighbour playing golf next to you. No, that's not right. I won't play golf - not with you around. I won't bow to that golden calf you carved out in front of the church you professed you believed in. How dare you say grace and corner me like you did.
It's making me wanna fight. It's making me wanna kick the asses of my vindicators and show them once and for all I am not the victim of their selfish bullies. It's making me angry. But it's making me stronger. It's making me richer. It's making me evolve. It's making me wanna fly and rise above the nonsense and the noise. I just wish you'd never existed.
I'm not saying this as a 'wait till I get my revenge' sort of thing. It's just a reaction to your inhuman behaviour. Why, look, the world is in chaos - children dying, bombs detonating, sky is falling - there is so much civil unrest. But there you are praying and thanking God that you are not like them, comfortable in your tie and suit, joking about the number of expensive cars you've got. Do I read hypocrisy?
Watch where you are headed towards. Don't sell out like the rest of the herd.
chucKie
Saturday, February 08, 2003
That Song on the radio
I was driving home after setting up a function at Windsors and Big Yellow Taxi came on just as I switched over from the Aimee Mann CD that's been playing in the stereo for the umpteenth time.
There's really something about this song. Joni Mitchell must be a genius. Wanted to buy this 50 bucks collection. But 50 bucks is quite a fair bit. I guess it's the way Adam Duritz sang the song. Kinda gave it a very fresh and different texture of longing mixed with resolve. Can't put my finger to it, really. All I know was that in the middle of the song, tears started welling up in my eyes. Didn't know why. Maybe I was partly excited and nostalgic.
Excited, because Duritz and his gang commonly known as the Counting Crows will be performing at the Palais Theatre this month and I've got tickets to go see them. Excited because I know I will get to see them perform my favourite songs again - which are too many to list here. More importantly, I'll definitely get to hear this song live in whatever mood and style they wanna do - which I'm sure will be such an epic.
Nostalgic, because it brings really fond memories of those days I spent at San Francisco waiting for tickets to the Counting Crows show outside Warfield Theatre. Managed to get in by some divine appointment. It was unbelievable. E-Gene was there too. One of the best shows I've attended and I remember telling myself I might never get to see them again. This was as close as it gets. I even managed to grab Adam's hand when he reached out to touch his fans in the front. After the rock solid concert, we took a long stroll back to the motel we were staying at and it started to drizzle so lightly, it was almost like snow flakes. This was the Dec 12, 1999 after all. Winter with Amy Hits the Atmosphere brimming in our heads were enough to give us a high no other drug could.
Now, I'm probably going to relive those moments again. I feel so blessed.
Off to work now.
chucKie
I was driving home after setting up a function at Windsors and Big Yellow Taxi came on just as I switched over from the Aimee Mann CD that's been playing in the stereo for the umpteenth time.
There's really something about this song. Joni Mitchell must be a genius. Wanted to buy this 50 bucks collection. But 50 bucks is quite a fair bit. I guess it's the way Adam Duritz sang the song. Kinda gave it a very fresh and different texture of longing mixed with resolve. Can't put my finger to it, really. All I know was that in the middle of the song, tears started welling up in my eyes. Didn't know why. Maybe I was partly excited and nostalgic.
Excited, because Duritz and his gang commonly known as the Counting Crows will be performing at the Palais Theatre this month and I've got tickets to go see them. Excited because I know I will get to see them perform my favourite songs again - which are too many to list here. More importantly, I'll definitely get to hear this song live in whatever mood and style they wanna do - which I'm sure will be such an epic.
Nostalgic, because it brings really fond memories of those days I spent at San Francisco waiting for tickets to the Counting Crows show outside Warfield Theatre. Managed to get in by some divine appointment. It was unbelievable. E-Gene was there too. One of the best shows I've attended and I remember telling myself I might never get to see them again. This was as close as it gets. I even managed to grab Adam's hand when he reached out to touch his fans in the front. After the rock solid concert, we took a long stroll back to the motel we were staying at and it started to drizzle so lightly, it was almost like snow flakes. This was the Dec 12, 1999 after all. Winter with Amy Hits the Atmosphere brimming in our heads were enough to give us a high no other drug could.
Now, I'm probably going to relive those moments again. I feel so blessed.
Off to work now.
chucKie
Overhaul
Kinda. Like it? Flooble something.
See you in the morning.
chucKie
Kinda. Like it? Flooble something.
See you in the morning.
chucKie
Friday, February 07, 2003
Upload
Finished the essay I was talking about. Uploaded it to the server. Felt so good.
It's a whooping 2.25am right now. Wonder how the weather will be today. Gotta go out and buy bow tie later in the evening. Cos Sat doing a function at Windsors and by the name of it, you can tell that it is hardcore black tie event - the mother of all formal functions. I have reason to believe it is a presidential styled wedding. Looking forward. Not so much to the cliche but the money that will come with it. Definitely need a lot more of it.
Promised myself to do an overhaul of this blog after I finished my essay tonight but the night slipped into the next wee hours of the morning so I guess it doesn't make any sense to continue as planned.
In case you are wondering why the change of mood and the lightness of being right now... try typing on a mac and you will know how it changes the way you feel.
my good ol' powerbook. Time to name ya...
chucKie
Finished the essay I was talking about. Uploaded it to the server. Felt so good.
It's a whooping 2.25am right now. Wonder how the weather will be today. Gotta go out and buy bow tie later in the evening. Cos Sat doing a function at Windsors and by the name of it, you can tell that it is hardcore black tie event - the mother of all formal functions. I have reason to believe it is a presidential styled wedding. Looking forward. Not so much to the cliche but the money that will come with it. Definitely need a lot more of it.
Promised myself to do an overhaul of this blog after I finished my essay tonight but the night slipped into the next wee hours of the morning so I guess it doesn't make any sense to continue as planned.
In case you are wondering why the change of mood and the lightness of being right now... try typing on a mac and you will know how it changes the way you feel.
my good ol' powerbook. Time to name ya...
chucKie
Thursday, February 06, 2003
Mess
I have an essay due tomorrow. 800 words. Critique of the web as a media for social relations. Sounds interesting but getting the toes into the water is the hardest part.
And it's a research essay. 800 words.
Went around looking for material on proquest and even attempting to head to the library but the bones underneath my flesh is in comatose mode, refusing to move.
Guess it's also the mess I'm in right now. Like this Desktop PC I am using for my essays and all other crap stuff is getting so very messy. Like I had to spend the whole night cleaning up the junk - too many games and programs on this workstation and the system keeps spitting out messages of 'Low Disk Space'. Did all that compression, deleting of programs and archiving and had to leave this monster switched on for the entire night. So I was literally sleeping next to a hot fan blaster. Yeap, that's how loud and industrial this self made AMD Win XP machine is. Still the machine is in quite a mess. Just look at my bookmarks on the browser. The links are everywhere. My desktop is filled with folders and shortcuts and web URLs. My Documents folder has close to 30,000 files. Did a properties check last night and it took the computer about 15 mins to finish calculating the size, folder and byte count. A little over 4 gb worth of data. How did I manage to do that?
Just want to reformat the entire hard drive, really. But I've never really done that before. The last time I tried deleting Win 2000 and install Win XP, I ended up having both 2000 and XP sitting side by side next to each other. Yeah, talk about IT savvy. Give me mustard sauce anytime!
Maybe I should just ditch this machine I made up for junk purposes and use the mac for my essay. Yeah, it's so much cleaner eh? But, argh! I hate to boot back and forth between OS 9 and X. Depending on what I work on, I usually boot to OS X. Now the default is OS 9.2 cos I've been working on a few tracks for a song. Now it's back to OS X, till the next time I sit down to work on something - which could be soon. Why is MotU taking so damn long to get to native X? It's making my life quite miserable at this stage.
But complaints and all that flak aside, I still have an essay to work on. I need a motivation to get me working. Like a movie treat later or something. I need to get out. I'm rotting as it is and it's a nice 26 degrees today. I need to rant. I need to run or something. I need to just ... ok, I need to go shit now. Maybe I'll feel better after that ...
I know! I'll start reading my research on the toilet seat - everyone's favourite inspiration throne.
chucKie
I have an essay due tomorrow. 800 words. Critique of the web as a media for social relations. Sounds interesting but getting the toes into the water is the hardest part.
And it's a research essay. 800 words.
Went around looking for material on proquest and even attempting to head to the library but the bones underneath my flesh is in comatose mode, refusing to move.
Guess it's also the mess I'm in right now. Like this Desktop PC I am using for my essays and all other crap stuff is getting so very messy. Like I had to spend the whole night cleaning up the junk - too many games and programs on this workstation and the system keeps spitting out messages of 'Low Disk Space'. Did all that compression, deleting of programs and archiving and had to leave this monster switched on for the entire night. So I was literally sleeping next to a hot fan blaster. Yeap, that's how loud and industrial this self made AMD Win XP machine is. Still the machine is in quite a mess. Just look at my bookmarks on the browser. The links are everywhere. My desktop is filled with folders and shortcuts and web URLs. My Documents folder has close to 30,000 files. Did a properties check last night and it took the computer about 15 mins to finish calculating the size, folder and byte count. A little over 4 gb worth of data. How did I manage to do that?
Just want to reformat the entire hard drive, really. But I've never really done that before. The last time I tried deleting Win 2000 and install Win XP, I ended up having both 2000 and XP sitting side by side next to each other. Yeah, talk about IT savvy. Give me mustard sauce anytime!
Maybe I should just ditch this machine I made up for junk purposes and use the mac for my essay. Yeah, it's so much cleaner eh? But, argh! I hate to boot back and forth between OS 9 and X. Depending on what I work on, I usually boot to OS X. Now the default is OS 9.2 cos I've been working on a few tracks for a song. Now it's back to OS X, till the next time I sit down to work on something - which could be soon. Why is MotU taking so damn long to get to native X? It's making my life quite miserable at this stage.
But complaints and all that flak aside, I still have an essay to work on. I need a motivation to get me working. Like a movie treat later or something. I need to get out. I'm rotting as it is and it's a nice 26 degrees today. I need to rant. I need to run or something. I need to just ... ok, I need to go shit now. Maybe I'll feel better after that ...
I know! I'll start reading my research on the toilet seat - everyone's favourite inspiration throne.
chucKie
Tuesday, February 04, 2003
The Wise Do it Differently
I guess the question comes down to what cuts the cake. The great Irish Author and Playwright has this to say ...
"People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are. I don't believe in circumstances. The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and if they can't find them, make them." - George Bernard Shaw.
Have you any idea the profoundness of this statement? Ask yourself one simple question, just one simple question today. What do you live for? You work, you eat, you get out on the weekends and maybe even get involved with some girl over a one night stand and drive those fast furious mobiles around the neighbourhood. You work more, you pay your bills, you get the latest internet applications, you walk the malls, you grace the places where you drink and puke them all out anyway.
Your parents love you. You take the rightful things and you rest on your laurels. You've got a good job, even though you haven't found it. Do you even know how to fish? There are 40 years ahead of you, some maybe more, like even 60 years of work - all that 9 - 5 shit. No, actually, all that 6am to 1am hardwork you put in for some microsoft wannabe creation. You dodge the traffic, take a puff, duck for shelter and arrive everyday only to leave exhausted. You take a chance, try on a girl for the rest of your life and end up with children you have no time to spend with. Cos you gotta work. Pay the bills, pay the rent. Pay the car. Damn it, even pay for the shopping cart ride your kid deserves. It's the best you can do. But time is a luxury you can't afford. And then you wonder why your neighbour gets up in the morning to walk the dog, bathe the kids, send them to school and come home, while you're rushing out to work, from a nice morning jog. Same house, same car, same gold credit card - but he's just starting the day and you're wishing you just started yesterday.
But I shall not bore you with metaphysical frustrations, even though that is how I feel.
I just want you to decide once and for all what you want. What you fucking want with your life! And go get it and stop whining. It's getting to me and I just wanna do you the favour and push you off the cliff. Once and for all. Because I wanna get out of here and live it. Yes, live. Don't you get it?
So stop telling me about your plans and the beautiful paintings you wish you created. Stop believing the lies. I'm moving out!
Or maybe I'm just too old for you.
chucKie
I guess the question comes down to what cuts the cake. The great Irish Author and Playwright has this to say ...
"People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are. I don't believe in circumstances. The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and if they can't find them, make them." - George Bernard Shaw.
Have you any idea the profoundness of this statement? Ask yourself one simple question, just one simple question today. What do you live for? You work, you eat, you get out on the weekends and maybe even get involved with some girl over a one night stand and drive those fast furious mobiles around the neighbourhood. You work more, you pay your bills, you get the latest internet applications, you walk the malls, you grace the places where you drink and puke them all out anyway.
Your parents love you. You take the rightful things and you rest on your laurels. You've got a good job, even though you haven't found it. Do you even know how to fish? There are 40 years ahead of you, some maybe more, like even 60 years of work - all that 9 - 5 shit. No, actually, all that 6am to 1am hardwork you put in for some microsoft wannabe creation. You dodge the traffic, take a puff, duck for shelter and arrive everyday only to leave exhausted. You take a chance, try on a girl for the rest of your life and end up with children you have no time to spend with. Cos you gotta work. Pay the bills, pay the rent. Pay the car. Damn it, even pay for the shopping cart ride your kid deserves. It's the best you can do. But time is a luxury you can't afford. And then you wonder why your neighbour gets up in the morning to walk the dog, bathe the kids, send them to school and come home, while you're rushing out to work, from a nice morning jog. Same house, same car, same gold credit card - but he's just starting the day and you're wishing you just started yesterday.
But I shall not bore you with metaphysical frustrations, even though that is how I feel.
I just want you to decide once and for all what you want. What you fucking want with your life! And go get it and stop whining. It's getting to me and I just wanna do you the favour and push you off the cliff. Once and for all. Because I wanna get out of here and live it. Yes, live. Don't you get it?
So stop telling me about your plans and the beautiful paintings you wish you created. Stop believing the lies. I'm moving out!
Or maybe I'm just too old for you.
chucKie
Saturday, February 01, 2003
Glitch
Realised that the suburb I'll be moving to isn't Preston. The name's actually Reservoir. What a name.
Would have prefered Preston. It's much easier to remember. Reservoir sounds so ... well, generic. Like if I said I was staying at Reservoir, you'd think I am staying near a reservoir. Like the fresh water catchment area plant where the drinking water comes from. The fact is, there isn't even a water catchment freshwater thingamajig in the vicinity. How did they ever arrive at the name for the suburb?
It's almost in the same rank with suburb names like Mountain, River, Canal, Gorge, Waterfall. 54 Canal Drive, Waterfall Park, Victoria 3766. How you like it now? If only. But for now, I'm stuck with Reservoir. What a joke.
It's really in Preston cos it's next to Reservoir and next to Preston. Kinda in between. Technicalities. For all you know, due to some future decentralizing, they might divide up the area and change the name of the suburb. Anytime soon? Well, hopefully it'll be a nice name like Water Creek Crescent or something.
Enough about that. I just had dinner at Mill Park - further than the suburb that I'll be staying at. CNY reunion dinner with a friend's family. There were like 11 of us at the dinner table having Tom Yam Steamboat. It was just oh so excellent. Nothing beats labour of love home made noodles and seafood steam boat. Half way through dinner, I was saying to myself that God is good. I was thankful for the grace and blessing. The surrogate parents of the hour and the surrogate family of the evening playing host to the lonely overseas kids. Felt weird and safe in a warm family setting. The hosts - Auntie Betty and Uncle Jake were excellent; sharing childhood stories of Alan and Steven and for a moment, we felt like we had known them for years. A small family of four sitting in a 12 room house (which I have yet to tour) who are not ashamed to love and open their doors to share the experience.
I had such a great time.
Happy Lunar's. Enter the year of the Ram.
chucKie
Realised that the suburb I'll be moving to isn't Preston. The name's actually Reservoir. What a name.
Would have prefered Preston. It's much easier to remember. Reservoir sounds so ... well, generic. Like if I said I was staying at Reservoir, you'd think I am staying near a reservoir. Like the fresh water catchment area plant where the drinking water comes from. The fact is, there isn't even a water catchment freshwater thingamajig in the vicinity. How did they ever arrive at the name for the suburb?
It's almost in the same rank with suburb names like Mountain, River, Canal, Gorge, Waterfall. 54 Canal Drive, Waterfall Park, Victoria 3766. How you like it now? If only. But for now, I'm stuck with Reservoir. What a joke.
It's really in Preston cos it's next to Reservoir and next to Preston. Kinda in between. Technicalities. For all you know, due to some future decentralizing, they might divide up the area and change the name of the suburb. Anytime soon? Well, hopefully it'll be a nice name like Water Creek Crescent or something.
Enough about that. I just had dinner at Mill Park - further than the suburb that I'll be staying at. CNY reunion dinner with a friend's family. There were like 11 of us at the dinner table having Tom Yam Steamboat. It was just oh so excellent. Nothing beats labour of love home made noodles and seafood steam boat. Half way through dinner, I was saying to myself that God is good. I was thankful for the grace and blessing. The surrogate parents of the hour and the surrogate family of the evening playing host to the lonely overseas kids. Felt weird and safe in a warm family setting. The hosts - Auntie Betty and Uncle Jake were excellent; sharing childhood stories of Alan and Steven and for a moment, we felt like we had known them for years. A small family of four sitting in a 12 room house (which I have yet to tour) who are not ashamed to love and open their doors to share the experience.
I had such a great time.
Happy Lunar's. Enter the year of the Ram.
chucKie
